Our Miracle is Here

Our Miracle is Here
Welcome Little Angel Grayson James Walker

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Slowing Down

Everything with the Grayson Project has taken off so fast!! Don't get me wrong, its exciting but a littl overwhelming. My goal right now is to come up with a schedule to prioritize everything that way it should be.  It takes alot of work to start an organization.  I've learned that very quickly.  I have also realized that if I don't watch out, The Grayson Project could take precedence over everything else in my life.  I know that everything with this project will come together in due time.  So much has been done and so many people have given generously.  The support of everyone locally, nationally, and internationally are what it takes to raise awareness for this cause.  Last Tuesday, June 19th, I was able to take our first Grayson's Gift to a family in Jackson, TN.  The gift basket included a bible, journal, canvas with ink pad for footprints, a blanket, bib, and a casting kit.  The Walkers were extremely thankful for this small gift.  It was my pleasure to pass along something dear to my heart.  Though Grayson couldn't be here to deliver the gift with me, his life is being remembered in the process.  I want to thank everyone for their prayers, encouragement, and donations towards this ministry!! It's all coming together and I'm simply remembering that it's all falling into place.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Enough heartache for one day

I woke up this morning reminded of another mommy who was on her way to have her precious baby girl.  Stephanie Cribb delivered a beautiful baby girl, Kendall, at 9:57 a.m.  I was praying the whole time but really wanted to pick up the phone or drive down to Georgia to just be there.  I felt the anxiety and anticipation of this sweet baby girls birth just like I did 3.5 months ago.  Though I wanted to just check the updates of this sweet family throughout the day, I wasn't able to because I had 6 children to look after.  My mind quickly went from sadness to joy as I watched them jump into the pool.  Their contagious giggles were just what I needed.  I thought and prayed about this sweet family throughout the day and saw their status.  Sweet Kendall went to be with Jesus.  I cried. I knew she was with Grayson, but I knew the sadness that was filling her parents' hearts.  I know that God is surrounding them with so much comfort right now.  I know that He is in that room.  I pray that they are able to sleep tonight.  The road isn't easy but it is possible.

As if that wasn't heartbreaking enough,  I discovered that a little girl, Lucy Krull, was fighting her battle with cancer once again.  From what I understand, she was doing well until this past weekend.  Apparently the cancer had come back and Lucy had taken a turn for the worse.  For the last year and a few months, we have been praying for this precious little angel.  She is beautiful, a bright-eyed little girl.  We prayed tonight, Ellie really pleading for God to help her not be in any pain anymore.  She feels very connected to Lucy though she hasn't met her before.  We will continue praying for both families.  My heart aches because I know the anguish that overtakes you.  I know that words offer no comfort.  I know that not much can be said to fill the emptiness in your heart.  So, today, tomorrow, and everyday, I will continue praying for God's will for both of these families.  That's all I can do right now...wish I could do so much more.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Grayson Project

So much has happened in the past few months.  Just two weeks ago, we were struggling emotionally over missing Grayson.  Patrick and I are felt like we were at the bottom, hopeless.  Well, not hopeless because we know that God is there, but hopeless that anything positive was going to come out of any of our journey.  Yes, I've had visions for the last year of what could be done through Grayson's short life and our journey through anencephaly, but never, in my wildest dreams did I think it would happen so quickly.

 After a few bad weeks in May and my first mother's day without Grayson, I felt defeated.  Patrick and I knew that we needed someone to come and save us from the pit that we were falling into.  After watching Private Practice on Tuesday night, Grayson's 3 months birthday, I found my self even more emotional.  I felt bitter and angry because I didn't have him with me.  It had hit me.  The realization that Grayson wasn't coming back and that I really just had a baby and had to bury him was too much for me to fathom.  How could I have had a baby and had to bury him within a few days of bringing him into the world?

With a bunch of different emotions running through my head, I clicked the button to upload my beautiful baby boy's photo.  Within 24 hours, I was notified that my photo had been removed because of content!! Content, my baby's face was removed because someone found it offensive.  In a world of sexual media and profanity, my sweet baby's newborn photo was too graphic?! I quickly posted a comment in my frustration, and that's all it took.  With the click of a button, the entire world was shaken.  Within 24 hours, Grayson's photo had done viral.  I'm not putting it lightly either.  I received messages from all over the world, some in different languages.  That's when the fire in my heart came back.  A precious baby boy with a fatal birth defect could shake a nation, a planet?!  Amazing.

Jesus.  Jesus. Jesus.  In the moment of desperation and pain, He came.  He didn't just send someone to rescue us out of the pit...he sent the world to encourage us.  That's how He does things.  Sometimes small and sometimes far bigger than you could ever imagine.  He chose for us, far bigger! I'm so glad He did.  God knew that three months after Grayson's death that the reality was going to hit me.  He knew that Private Practice was going to have a doctor on there that was pregnant with anencephaly.  He also knew that I would be watching it and that I was already an emotional wreck.

Here it goes....in my weakness, His power was made perfect.  He knew.  He knew since the beginning of time that the week of May 12th was going to be a rough one for Heather and Patrick Walker.  So, like He always does, He proved Himself faithful once again.  He showed up and showed off!  What some meant for evil against us...God meant for good.

Our vision for starting something came into fruition within a week.  Now, two weeks later, Grayson Project, is a non-profit organization.  Did I think that it would happen this fast, no.  But, Grayson's story reached across an entire planet and you can't tell me that wasn't God's timing.  I'm happy to say that we planned our first event.  We designed t-shirts with our logo and Psalm 139:13-14.  We had an amazing turn out at the Chik-fil-a in Millingotn.  People came to support Grayson.  They came knowing that God's plan was underway.  After four incredible hours of meeting people and selling shirts, we concluded our first Grayson Project event.